Hi Gina! (Hope you don't mind if a male chimes in here!)

I understand your primary ebook method uses Emotion Freeing Technique. My experience with with EFT came after nearly losing my wife at the birth of our third child and, less than 8 months later, having a near-death experience myself … which began my chronic illness (which has not helped our sex life).

I found the EFT moderately effective at dissipating (freeing from?) my grief at (potential) loss. I remember a surprising explosion of grief and tears as the therapist pressed me to rehearse the emotions many months after the causative events.

But I say I found the EFT effects modest probably in part because the primary cause(s) of my illness lay elsewhere, and perhaps also because I always had reservations about unreserved self-acceptance, arguably a bed-rock doctrine in EFT.

Even were I not speaking in regard to my belief in the universal indictment of human nature classically drawn out, for example, in Paul's epistle to the church at Rome (esp. chs. 1 – 3), one ought to have a sense of guilt everyday (cf. for example 1 John 1:8-2:1) despite the presence of false guilt. The absence of guilty feelings is a sign of the suppression of truth in unrighteousness rather than a trick to the subconscious mind to get myself to feel more loving. Or in Jesus' language, the plank is in my eye, the mere speck in yours.

Of course, the picture is more complicated than that. For one thing, real guilt may include failure to accept that God has not given me the same ebullient character, the same knack for numbers, the same social and managerial savvy, the same joy in sex — or whatever — as my neighbor, my coworker, my family member. Yes, as a coach to such things I know you would want to give hope in improvement and rightly so, but here my point is that self-acceptance insofar as it extends to giftedness in nature and nurture may be a legitimate application of EFT's “I totally accept my …” affirmation. Here, my acceptance is of the way God made me and of the influences His many acts of Providence have had on me for my good and His glory.

… And for another thing, the Bible that I believe suffices to give answers to such matters assumes self love. “Love your neighbor as yourself (or as you love yourself).” If anything, “do not regard yourself more highly than you ought … ” (Romans 12) — which assumes the danger is too great a love of self rather than too little.

Yet my gut-level, intuitive response to what I now understand of your ebook is that you are on to something real, something worthwhile, something that helps explain many a woman's poor experiences with the gift of sex, not least because it places responsibility on the woman to change what the woman can, namely herself. And I can begin to understand how emotions and bodily health are connected. (I also do not doubt that there are parallel applications to men using EFT, though the male in some ways acts like a different species–or so it sometimes seems!)

A way out of guilt (false or real) may incorporate the human will and, for all I know, the reverse-engineering of emotions via EFT's tapping-with-affirmation. And within a Christian milieu, the central model ought to include accepting one another “as the Lord accepted you” (Romans 15) — defeatist and discouraged and unbelieving warts and all.

For me, the bed rock doctrine is not self-acceptance per se, but accepting the love of God for unlovely me. Jesus said “Deny yourself, take up your cross, and follow Me.” As the self dies to sin in identification with the death of Jesus, so it is raised with Jesus, enabled in this life not to sin (not that the Christian never sins–the struggle continues … so Romans 6). And as far as I can tell, there ought to be an application, a joyful application, to sex as God created it.

Thus in sum you see my ventilation of an issue with which I have struggled from time to time over a period of years. I hope you will indulge me an ear and offer any wisdom God may have given you, but hitherto withheld from me (cf. Deut. 29:4).