"It's not supposed to be like this."
Have you ever looked at your circumstances with disappointment and thought, “It wasn’t supposed to BE LIKE THIS!” Unfulfilled goals and dreams can make the heart sick. However, there is one powerful force that will take you through it: Persistence.
Persistence is the ability to know that failure is never final. Losing a battle does not mean you will lose the war. In fact, it has been said that if you find yourself going through hell then KEEP GOING! The Valley of the Shadow of Death, is still just a shadow. You can choose your reality.
Winston Churchill once described SUCCESS as the ability to go from failure to failure without the loss of enthusiasm. How in the world are normal people like you and me supposed to do that? As with most things I believe it starts with a decision. We must decide that we will not let the seeds of disappointment grow into a tree of despair. Disappointment always comes with opportunity for something new. Indeed in the words of Napoleon Hill,
“Every adversity, every failure, every heartache carries with it the seed on an equal or greater benefit.”
Think about a seed for a moment. The most important element for that seed is rain. Without rain it will shrivel up and die. Your “rainy” seasons of disappointment are merely raining on the seeds you have sown towards your dream. Don’t give up now. Trust in the power of seed, time and harvest. The sun always returns.
Get up and sow more seed of daily action towards your goals. Look at what worked well and what didn’t work so well in the past, and make adjustments. Make a plan. Take more action. Stay in faith. Your future is NOT determined by your past. It’s determined by what you do next.
So, you’ve thought “It wasn’t supposed to BE like this?” That’s good. It shows you sense that you are called to something better. Keep going with the knowledge that it’s all part of your success story. Those who persist ultimately win. You too will persist, and you WILL WIN.
Those who sow in tears shall reap with songs of joy. -Psalm 126:5
-Gina Parris
{ 13 comments… read them below or add one }
Thank you. This post is very timely for me. As I try to balance taking care of my family and myself, while pursuing my professional goals, it's easy to get discouraged when circumstances don't line up as I planned. I remind myself, as you said, that I am called to something better and I'm committed to doing my part.
Sometimes taking a break from it all can give you the energy you need to be persistent.
Thanks for this piece. Disappointment some times comes to us as loss of opportunity or failure to “succeed” in a given event. Take for example “dreams” when our dream or desired outcome doesn't pan out; you have choices – I find choosing to align with a new dream is the quickest way to recovery.
A recent personal example: I embraced Libbys Food and other corporate matching $$ and promoted the Virtual Canned Food Drive – setting what I thought was a modest goal of $2500 to be raised from the many hundreds of acquaintances. We fell more than $900 short, I was astounded and disappointed. Then I realized what we had accomplished – the money we (and I mean we, as my family's contribution was but one of many) raised, coupled with the corporate matches ($1 became $4) provided sufficient funds for Feeding America to put 44,000 meals on the table of those family's who hunger. A disappointment, which in reality was a great success.
Thanks again,
Christopher @BurgessCT
Wow Christopher – that's a great example. Way to look at the big picture and rejoice at what was accomplished. That makes me think of the saying that if we aim for the moon at least if we miss, we'll be among the stars!
Angie – I'm in the same boat as you, raising our kids is a busy season even though sending one off to college next year makes me cringe at how fast it goes by. Thanks for sharing – let's keep reaching for what's higher while we celebrate where we are.
Katherine – I think that's exactly right. Sometimes it takes restraint to actually take a break when necessary.
Hey Gina, great post! It brings to mind two things.
First, just like the seed needs a little rain – it also needs to be buried. It takes a lot of faith to be buried in the ground and told you will grow big and strong one day. The seed germinates and slowly it's chutes fight to the surface, but if it didn't keep on persisting to reach the sun the seed would die.
Second, the parable of the sower in the Bible supports your advice above. Many people miss that the sower saw his seeds eaten by the birds, dried out by the sun, and choked by the weeds – AND he kept on sowing. If you persistently sow enough good seed it will eventually take root in good soil.
Brad – thanks so much for that note about the sower continuing to sow – even as some seeds get killed! My son met with a Division 1 Baseball coach today and they are seeing him still in the planting stage for sure. Whether they want to be the ones to “water and fertilize him” we'll see! We had this same talk though about all the seeds he's sown up till now and the time he still has to blossom even more as a player!
Gina, you are awesome. The last few months have been the hardest for me professionally (self-inflicted because of my entrepreneurial desire) and you remind me that it won't always be that way. Anything worth doing will be difficult, and whatever pain you experience now will ALWAYS lead to something better.
“Your future is NOT determined by your past. It’s determined by what you do next.”
I love it! Thank you so much!
Well Dean – I for one am so glad you are continuing on! I love the work you're doing and what a joy to have connected here in cyberworld. Thanks for commenting. Many have shared similar comments about parts of '09. The great news is its a brand new day and God's mercies are new every morning.
Rock on!
Great write, Gina! My husband and I started our first business almost nine years ago, and boy, has it been a study in perserverance. It has taken us to some dark places. We could have given up our dreams years ago (and many advised us to do so!) but we didn't. Our path has had some incredible twists and turns, but the more we stood strong, the more doors have been opened to us. The key is to mix persistence with an ability to adapt. It's still not easy, but is it rewarding!
Thank you Rebecca! Mega kudos to you guys for sticking with it. When we can find reward in the work we do, than we are blessed indeed. Thanks for sharing – and keep up the great work you're doing.
GREAT blog! My favorite line… “We must decide that we will not let the seeds of disappointment grow into a tree of despair.” Thanks for a great reminder! Sometimes I find if I am describing a disappointment, by using the words “For Now” at the end of the sentence always adds that bit of hope and the expectation that change is inevitable.
GREAT blog! My favorite line… “We must decide that we will not let the seeds of disappointment grow into a tree of despair.” Thanks for a great reminder! Sometimes I find if I am describing a disappointment, by using the words “For Now” at the end of the sentence always adds that bit of hope and the expectation that change is inevitable.