Are You Needy?

by Gina Parris

kiss_me_im_needy_tshirt-

Are you needy?

Earlier this week one of my friends, the lovely @CarlaYoung,

asked if we have a “to don’t”
list as well as a “to do” list. I replied that I have one for sure
and it’s always directed at my children:

“DON’T ever date needy people.”

You know what a needy date is right? Someone who is insecure
and needs you to fulfill their self-image and self esteem, and
to in fact be their happiness committee. It’s an impossible and
unfair job. Do not ever fall into it.

This raises the question though, are you needy yourself?

As I work with different people from all over the world it
is interesting how often they tell me what they “need.”
Have you ever found yourself making any statements like these:

I need more money. I need more confidence. I need to lose
weight, I need to get organized, I need to get stronger, I need to
get healthy, I need new shoes… The list goes on and on.

It’s easy to accept such statements as a natural part of our
vocabulary, but I think talking about your need keeps you
in a “needy” state. Why? Because you are telling yourself that
on some level you are incomplete.

That is nonsense!

You are complete now and if you act as if you have already
achieved your goal, you will accomplish it with greater speed.

You may be thinking, “Yes, but I really need ___________.”

Fine – than go get it, be it, do it, whatever! Just don’t stand
there talking about needing it. You can’t be needy and powerful
at the same time. Talking about your need is giving your power
away, and I want you to STAND in your power.

I recommend that you start to notice the words that come out of
your mouth. Are you talking about all your lack and everything
you need, or do you speak with gratitude about all you have?
Awareness is the first step towards growth. I know I want to
raise my awareness of everything that is great.

How about you? What are some things you’ve been thinking
that you “need” but that really you will choose to just get?

I’d love to hear about it.

Until next time, keep playing to win and I’ll be right here…

In your corner,

Gina

Gina

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{ 11 comments… read them below or add one }

Nelson Swett July 30, 2010 at 8:33 pm

great post gina. I would humbly add that in addition touh monitoring what comes out of our mouths that we monitor our internal dialogue; what we think about and say to ourselves.

Reply

GinaParris July 30, 2010 at 9:04 pm

I was thinking about that today too, Nelson. The thing is sometimes the dialogue comes without actual words, its just a feeling which can be either good or bad!

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Julie Sibert July 31, 2010 at 10:09 pm

Okay, let me say… absolutely love this post! I just read it verbatim to my 12-year-old son. Couldn't agree with you more Gina… thanks for a well-written piece!

Reply

GinaParris July 31, 2010 at 11:49 pm

Ha ha. Thanks Julie, I'm sure your son was less impressed than you, but I appreciate it! It is the best lesson for our kids and in our case, it's probably part of the secret to our long and happy marriage.

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Jacochlo August 1, 2010 at 12:11 am

Love this Gina . . . Thanks for sharing!

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jodymaley August 1, 2010 at 10:23 am

This is sooooo True Gina

By saying the 'I need' we are indeed attracting more 'needs' into our lives!!!!
Funny that you mentioned Carla Young….my friend Michelle Weimer's company is working with her right now and she recommended I get ahold of her for my radio show…ha ha
Love this small world!!!
J

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GinaParris August 2, 2010 at 12:36 pm

Oh yeah, Carla is awesome!

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GinaParris August 2, 2010 at 5:36 pm

Oh yeah, Carla is awesome!

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Tom Watson August 16, 2010 at 8:41 pm

That was a powerful post. Spoken from the heart too. To be honest with you I'll will come back and re-read it again, just with a glass of wine.

Thanks.

Tom

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Gina Parris August 16, 2010 at 11:17 pm

Thanks for chiming in Tom. It’s been fun connecting with you today!

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Tom Watson August 17, 2010 at 12:56 pm

I posted the following
“That was a powerful post. Spoken from the heart too. To be honest with you I'll will come back and re-read it again, just with a glass of wine”

to this post when it was really for the previous post, which of course bothered me enough to return and fix it!

With that said…the “needy” post was good as well.

Reply

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